In August of 2005, well, probably before that, Patrick and I had been praying about our family. What direction did God want us to go in? Have more babies? Foster care? Adopt from Korea? (Patrick is 1/2 Korean, so we always thought that would be cool.) Or, did God want me to be satisfied with the 4 children that we had? As I prayed over it and studied my Bible for guidance, God increased the desire for more children in my heart. As much as I prayed "Lord, if I am not to have more children, please remove the desire" He never did! So then I start with, "Okay, God, but I want a girl! Too much testosterone around her...can I PLEASE have a girl baby??" And as I prayed that for a few days, this is the verse God gave me: Psalm 20:4-5 "May he give you the desires of your heart and make all your plans succeed. We will shout for joy when you are victorious and will lift up our banners in the name of our God. May the Lord grant all your requests." The next day, "You have granted him the desires of his heart and have not withheld the request of his lips." Psalm 21:2 See, sometimes it takes God more than one time to get through to me...I know...I'm weird! And then, a few days later, "Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do this! he will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun." Psalm 37:3-6 And then, 2 months later, when it felt like nothing was happening, "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him." Psalm 37:7
The "be still and wait" verses have come to me in abundance over the last 3 years. In the meantime, as you know, God led us to foster care. GIRL BABIES IN ABUNDANCE!!! RIGHT??? Nope. My first call...TWO smelly boys! My second call...Jacob. My third call...Finally...a girl, but she was 2 1/2 and she came with...yep...a brother!!!! SERIOUSLY???? So we put bows on the boys...KIDDING!
Oh...I almost forgot what this post was about. Awhile after receiving my promise, I was sitting in church, listening to Pastor Doug. I was not even thinking about babies or promises, but a still, small voice whispered "Emma Claire". I thought it was a pretty name, so I wrote it in my Bible and went on. A few weeks later, I found the name in my Bible and decided to look it's meaning up. Well, Emma means "complete' and Claire means "with clarity". God was telling me that my baby girl would be named Emma Claire and I would know our family was complete when she came to us.
I also knew that Emma would not come right away and I have been fine with that. It has been exciting to see how God has orchestrated this entire promise. If I had limited God and just taken girl babies, we would not have had our Jacob. We would probably not have had "S" & "J", either. I am so thankful that I listened to God on this one!
Since Jacob's death, God has opened my eyes to many things. In the past, my Bible has always said "Wait on the Lord". ALWAYS! Now, my Bible is saying things like "soon" and "not in the distant future, but right NOW!" I have no idea what God is about to do in our lives, but I am so excited I just can't help but share!
We sold our house. Remember last week when I posted that God told me He would "smooth out the road ahead of us"? That was 9/17. On 9/24, one week later, God sold our house to a wonderful Christian couple. When we close, on 10/15, we will be signing up with an adoption ministry to pursue an independent adoption. We will not have the option of specifying the gender that we want (GIRL) but I am so open to God's will on this one. And I know that Emma Claire will join our family one day. I just can't wait to watch it all unfold!
"For I am God-I alone! I am God, and there is no one else like me. Only I can tell you what is going to happen even before it happens. Everything I plan will come to pass, for I do whatever I wish...For I am ready to set things right, not in the distant future, but right now! I am ready to save Jeruslem and give my glory to Israel." Isaiah 46:9-10, 13
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